Dear Dimitri The Lover: Like You, I am Anti-Condom and Pro-Life! How Do You Prevent Pregnancy? WWDD If A Slut Got Pregnant?

Dear Dimitri The Lover: 

I gotta say that I don’t agree with everything you write, but I agree with your main points on masculinity and the general shittiness of feminism. And I fuckin love Ron Paul as well. You have said in the past that you believe that abortion is murder. I do as well. You also say that you don’t like to use condoms. And it appears that you use the pull out method to prevent pregnancy. Assuming the articles I have read are correct, the pull out method reduces the potential risk of pregnancy but not by nearly as much as a properly used condom would. My question is this: How do you make sure the numerous sluts you bang don’t get pregnant? And what would you do if they did?

Thanks, Dan

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Dear Dan:

Firstly, LONG LIVE RON PAUL!
 
Secondly, thank you very much for your question.  Unfortunately for you, my answer is over 6,000 words in length.  I know you young guys all have ADD, so please try to bear with me.  I have spent several hours to formulate a response to your question in order to ensure that you are a better man after reading it. 

Withdrawal is a 100% effective form of birth control IF USED PROPERLY.  The small failure rate reported with this technique is due to men first waiting until their cocks start pulsating, THEN pulling out.  You have to pull out BEFORE that happens, which obviously makes the experience less pleasurable for you.  If you trust the slut, you can use the rhythm method, which is also extremely effective.  If you really want to cum inside her but you do not trust her, just fuck her cunt for a while, then when you are a few minutes away from blasting your load, ASSFUCK her.  ASSFUCKING is appropriate in this case for two reasons.  Firstly, you cannot get her pregnant unless cum leaks out of her asshole and down to her cunt, so watch for that.  Secondly, if you do not trust her, then there is obviously a valid reason for how you feel … most likely she is a MANIPULATIVE CUNT … in which case she DESERVES A VICIOUS ASSFUCK.  It becomes karmic at that point.  You must deliver the retribution of the Gods.
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